May 2013
2 posts
One of the only things
Im bad at is calling people out. Im really good with talking about someone behind their backs but to confront someone is really hard for me. I only call peiple out personally if theyre a very, very close friend or if I literally dont give a ball of what they think of me. This is one of the only things in bad at
This semester.
Man oh man…. until last week I was failing 3 classes. I also had a C. And one A and one B.
By next thursday ill have 2As and 4bs. Ill take that because I honestly slacked the whole year and I’m undeserving of good grades.
Human exam tmw. Just gonna wing it amd hope for dat 5 hahahahahahhaha
April 2013
1 post
a long pointless post
as i take things in and live everyday like a machine, i feel lost. for sure many things are going on…but…i just don’t worry about them anymore. i guess im happy, because i have no worries, no discipline. im only happy because i allowed myself to let go of everything that gives me stress. ie school and “friends”. i guess i like to be independent with my...
March 2013
10 posts
what's really been on my mind lately.
a couple days back my mom and I were talking about college. I told her my plan and stuff. and as I was telling her this “plan” she interrupted me and asked if I minded going to a college in New York. and I was just like….wtf and said “if I get in I guess”. then she told me when I graduate there is a good chance shes going to move to New York. I was caught so off guard...
tonight
was such a rollercoaster. speaking of rollercoasters im gonna be riding some in spring break.
anyways. i can’t express in words of the sorrow and disappointment i felt tonight. i really never felt anything like it, because i really didnt expect to see what i saw. i felt my heart literally breaking and it really didnt feel good. that was the first time where my heart felt numb. my whole...
scared
why am I so scared to live out my faith? I want to be shameless, but then again, how will I give up all of the world? to follow Him I need to give up so many things…..but Jesus gave up his life for me. why can’t I sacrifice things I love to live out the life that was meant for me from God? selfishness and pride kill me. I tell God I need directions. but the thing is I know where my...
I guess
the best thing anyone could have is originality. just original in their own ways, where no one is the same as them.
whether dumb or smart, rich or poor, black or white…
a person should be original and live in their original ways without conforming to society. but everyone’s too afraid to do that because of judgement, me included.
is it bad that
i only care for things that are absolutely necessary to care for? i know it’s bad that I only care of what just happened just because it’s my dad. literally of anybody else said the same exact thing, I literally wouldn’t give one, two, or three freaks about it. and is it bad that I want to leave this house because I hate having to care to do things I don’t want to do? I...
February 2013
14 posts
FIRST JOB
LIFETIME SUMMER CAMP COUNSELOR WOOHOOOO
plan for the summer.
priorities: Costa rica missions……..AND THATS ABOUT IT
jobs: lifetime daycare/babysit/takingcareofkids and bookmeiser.
and the cool thing about lifetime daycare/babysit/takingcareofkids is that…though you get paid minimum wage, you get a free membership!! i cant wait to make money and have 100 dollars or more to spend a week. omg
sucks
THIS SUCKS I CAN’T WAIT TIL FRIDAY
dreams and reality
to this day I confuse reality with dreams, or dreams with reality. it really sucks when I have an awesome dream and I think it’s the reality. but when I have bad dreams, I’m so glad that it was only a dream. my dreams have been all over the place. but with all
the hectic things going on in my dreams, I still love it because everything I want.
I wish I can lucid dream again.
recently
i’ve been realllll happy. haha. i think quitting league is helping me a lot. though i still think about it everyday and get tempted to play, the fact that im fighting my urges and my selfishness helps me to become a better person. i’ve had so much work the last couple of weeks and honestly it sucks so much. but at the same time i havent had this intimate relationship with God is so...
you know what
I kinda want to give up. I feel as if I’m the only one trying. honestly speaking, I’ve never had a friend like you. I’ve never met anyone like you and it makes me mad how…you say one thing and act the other. i mean, at least to certain point…I want to see you work for it but you won’t.
whatever. I had such a good week filled with SO MUCH WORK. ive never had so...
This week. Well the end of last week and early...
Basically, I had 3 projects that I needed to do last weekend. These projects were….easy but very time consuming. I procrastinated and chose to just do it all that weekend, which I did. On Friday I stayed up til 4 doing a book project. On Saturday I stayed up til 3 finishing the book project. On Sunday I stayed up til 3 again finishing a mole project. And Yesterday I stayed up til 2 doing a...
oh to be like you,
ill give all i have just to know you
what does that even mean..
i feel like im doing too little, im reminded everyday of how Jesus died for me and all i do for him is read Genesis. i feel so in love with Him but because this feeling of actually loving someone is so unnatural for me, it’s hard to tell myself its actually love. like every relationship, i want to take things slow but, i...
just when i was becoming so uneasy
God shows himself.
“ok guys, we have..you, joseph, and silvia going for sure to the mission trip. we have til next sunday to fill in spots, 13 people.”
its amazing how…God can work through pbrian and how God can really shun every doubt i had for the missions. and i was really surprised at the meeting today, when pbrian told me that we have 14 people going and that...
January 2013
29 posts
It's pride
That gets in the way of everything. Man…
Ok so recently I’ve gotten into reading. It’s awesome. Reading is fascinating. It’s like…I get to dive into someone’s thoughts and their lives—without having to go out of my way to talk to the person. Reading is so fun (no sarcasm intended). But yeah recommend me some good books y’all
As I'm trying to sleep
My heart keeps racing. I’m so tired but I’m so hyper at the sametime. I jus wanna sleep but my heart wants me to get up an run around.
Why am I do indecisive
A bad habit of mine.
I set goals. I know that setting goals is a good thing, but sometimes I get so into achieving my goal that I forget about everything else and I become so consumed with this goal. But when that goal that I’ve been trying to reach for so long is reached, then I realize I’ve become bored. The only reason why I kept striving for that goal was cuz I wanted it so much in the past and I just...
1 tag
hitler, stalin, kim jong ill, fidel
i believe that they were all great leaders. they did whatever it took to get what they want, and isn’t that how we live our lives right now? though some of their thoughts were mest up and corrupt, they went against the odds and they changed the world. they lied, they tricked everyone. they were all very convincing and they all worked so hard to get to where they ended up in. i have deep...
Reblog if you have a really nice dick.
letssfuckshitupp:
The notes <3
unfinished story
this sheet of paper that i’ve been looking for so long.
i knew it was somewhere, but never did i imagine it to be there.
i found the story at school. i read it over, and over, and over again. when i was reading this story i felt very weird, and i began to become really sad. i honestly didn’t expect the story to be so….unfinished. it’s almost as if the person who wrote...
Anonymous asked: When life gets hard, always remember to smile.
Anonymous asked: keep strong.
"was the cross not enough for you?"
"what is love"
“Love is when you give and expect nothing in return. It is when you put that person’s happiness before yours and you love them and their flaws because you’re so blinded by their illusion of perfection. But like everything else, love fades and dies because nothing lasts forever.”
ugh
the concert tonight was such a drag. i mean, it was good and all, but…..idk. i really didnt wanna be there.
i need to be myself. and if I’m not who you think i was, then i guess we can’t be friends. (LOL your loss) maybe if im myself more, i can discover who i am. i really don’t understand why certain things cant be more interesting to me. why does everything have to be so...
A good smile
On a girl can be such an awesome trait.
You can be the pretties girl on the planet, but with a bad smile….
Yeah. Smiles are very important. At least to me
I think this is the reason why I feel this way.
I was talkin to David today and he said something that really stuck out to me. I told him how I was feeling and I told him of the train of events that happened last few weeks.
I told him I used to be pretty sad. I looked forward to nothing and everything sucked.
Then something happened that made me really really happy.
Then something happened that made me come back to where I used to be.
He...
Boldness
Sometimes I wish i can be as BOLD as other people. I always remember joon telling my that he’s jealous of my BOLDNESS and that he wants to be as bold as I was.
But the thing is, yeah I was as bold as a little punk can be, people judged me, and I was a bad example of a good person. I’d Cus, I’d speak my mind, I’d do anything that would make something satisfy me. Being BOLD...
so lately
i’ve been asking myself “what if I made up everything, like the whole world and everyone who lives in it, but forgot everything so that i can live a life full of learning? and i made all these things to make life more realistic…what is the power of my mind?”
and after asking myself that for a while, someone asked me this: “are you your own God?”
i believe...
It's so hard
To stray your heart from feeling something it wants to.
For my first new years resolution,
-every night I see The stars, I will watch over them and think about life for 10 minutes. No matter how cold, how hot, how windy, how wet. No matter where or when, I will.
-I shall make more Spontaneus “must do’s” because it’s fun and it takes me more and more away from everyday...
